Friday, April 27, 2007

1st Anniversary

As I sit here eating 2 day old apple crumble I was made to make at 1 am by my little brother I am contemplating what has happened to the last year? Where has it gone and what have I done with it? Where are the accomplishments?

Before you all panic it’s not my birthday but rather the 1 year anniversary of my blog. Its happy anniversary to Ever! One year of putting my happenings, thoughts, feelings and any thing and everything into space.

I did it for the basic reason that I wanted some place to store all my useless stuff!!!!

Really I did it so that I could talk to my friends and keep up with their lives even when we are not living in each others pockets. I love been part of something so big. It’s cool to read peoples and have them read mine knowing they are across the world.

NM thank you for bugging me all those weeks and each time I lapsed (making me sound like an addict here) you and WA got me back with the thing you two are best at – NAGGING.
I miss you lots NM. Looking forward to your return to our fair city…

Here’s is to the next year of blogging…

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

The M word

Life is pretty amazing. Not always in the way you hope it would be. It can be totally annoying and exacerbating.

All my friends are either married or on their way to getting married or trying to get married. I say this cause this seems to be all that’s on the topic at the moment.
Its what parents talk to me about, what friends talk to me about and even work colleges who are so into the whole “getting it where/when you can” are trying to set me up with eligible Muslim men. They question why am I not married? Why indeed. Why do people have to be paired up to be seen to be happy?

Basically it has got to the stage that I can’t talk to anyone male for fear of getting knowing looks from work colleges and more from friends.

Anyway both parents have now taken it on themselves to “present” people. Why does it have to happen to me? I know it has to happen at sometime but I think this is the worst and confusing time they could have chosen.

As with all of life when it rains it pours and I now have a nice man talking to me of what I am sure is the same subject.
Life is indeed interesting, confusing, exacerbating, exhilarating, tiring, confusing and damn good at the moment.

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Green peach...

Life is always weird. You know this because things change on you all the time. There is nothing you can take for granted and this more than anything else is what keeps it interesting and fresh. You wake and you are grateful you get to see another day (even if you hate work like me); somewhere within yourself you thank someone (God or Allah as you please). Don’t even think of saying you wake and just get on with getting up and ready. There is always that moment/s when you wake and you realise you are alive and you are you. This is always an inspiring thing for me.

I am a person who tends to wake early mainly for work. I get up just before 530am most days to get to work at 645am to be there and ready. I even get to have breakfast (which I take from home with me) at work as handover doesn’t actually start till 715am. I wake for Fajr most days. On my days off or when I am on an afternoon shift, I wake and think for awhile. I savour the idea that even though I have to get up and pray – meaning I have to leave my warm bed and splash cold water around to do my Wudu – I know I will go back to bed and sleep a few hours longer. That is heaven for me.

I had the good fortune of doing that today – waking and sleeping for a few extra and well deserved hours. I had the luxury of waking and getting out of bed at the grand old time of 1120am. That’s 6 more hours than normal. That’s double the sleep I get on good day when I work. Obviously this puts in a typically good mood. I get to see my mum and little brother (cheers me up even more). I laze about and head out just after mid day as this is a scout day and I have a special program planned for the scouts and leaders that will be joining me this evening. I am so excited and happy that I help my mum run a few errands and even that does not damped my spirits.
Today things are cool, I go to our favourite eatery and I get a salad (before you picture rabbit food let me tell you that this salad consists of hummus, spicy potato’s and tabula) for me and WA who is also a scout leader. While walking to meet WA I use my phone and sort some finance problems that I have been avoiding and as per usual it’s not as bad as I was imagining when I had my head buried in the sand! I m almost at WA work place when a car beeps at me and I wave thinking its some of my sisters friends from her Islamic school as there are two people in the car who are wearing white scarves! I carry on walking when I see that the car has stopped and out gets Kitty and she shouts for me, turns out WA was in the car as well! I really do need glasses. I thought Kitty’s aunt (the driver for goodness sake) was a school kid. I really can be pretty dumb at times. But hey we can’t all be 100% all the time – even a person as perfect as me has her bad days!!!!
Kitty has left our green city again after her brief yet wonderful visit to return to boring old London. What’s so great about that city anyways Kitty?? You should really consider coming home to s again and soon. I do pray that you settle in wherever place would be better for you in this life and the hereafter. Hope you my love have a great time in Canada and may what’s best for you happen InshaAllah.
I, WA, Flower lady’s sister, Kitty and her sister and Native Female’s sister had a lovely time in Nero for an hour or so discussing what hijabis discuss now days. Lord only knows what we talked about as it feels so long ago. The only thing that stuck in my head was when NF’s sister started talking about parenthood and I was thinking while listening that she is one cool mother. Her baby is 7 months old and she is already out and having job interviews. May Allah make her successful InshaAllah.
We made sure that Londinians returned to their adopted city by personally putting them and their freakishly large volume of bags on the train. While at the station we had another coffee as we had time to kill as it is said. While trying to pay for the coffee I had quick glance in my hand bag and pulled out what I had thought to be my purse. My purse is purple and lilac mixed together it is MashaAllah beautiful and when looked down and tried to get money out of it I saw to my shock and horror that I had in fact pulled out a purple always pad instead of my purse. The look on the waiter’s face just made me so embarrassed. If I was white and capable of blushing I would have been beetroot at that time. I looked down and got my purse and refused to look at the man even when he was talking to me. Obviously this was very amusing for WA who had witnessed it all to my horror.
OH the shame of it.
We returned to our favourite eatery on Wilmslow road and had to order more salad as the one I had brought earlier never reached its destination i.e. someone who shall remain anonymous had eaten it before I could get to it!!
Time is an amazing commodity. You can never return it once it’s gone. You can ponder and evaluate it but it can never be returned once it has passed. By the time we had eaten and had our usual mint tea it was 530pm and the Banker had joined us. I informed the girls that the plan for the scouts today was to have fire crew along with the fire engine to come and speak to the Scouts. I had been in touch with the Fire officer for the last few weeks and everything was confirmed. Just to make sure I phoned at 610pm and he reassured me that everything was fine and the fire crew would meet us and the Scouts at 730pm as planned. I then think to myself that since the fire officer that I am in contact with is unlikely to be the person giving the talk I should maybe speak to that person directly. I phone them at 640pm and get the message I must have been dreading (deep down somewhere) that they can’t make it as they are not allowed to leave the station all night (they work 6pm till Lord only knows)!!! My good mood carries on its own as I start to panic. We have no plan for the scouts. This fire crew session was going to take up all the meeting time for our group. What do I do now? This is all that’s going through my mind. Its then that I realise I am not alone. WA and the Banker are with me and the Ketchup is on her way. We are geniuses cause we pull it off and it turns out to be one of the best Scouts meeting I attend and the kids seem to really benefit from it. The Fire crew session is shelved till next week. The kids are none the wiser as I never told them the plan as I must have been intuitive about the likelihood that it would be cancelled…

There is reason to be grateful each and every time you wake. You have no clue what you will go though that day. Be grateful even if it is not to your liking and it diverts from your original plan as it maybe better this way for you. And anyways you are who you are before of the crap and good things you experience.
It’s late now and tomorrow is work day but it’s a good kind of workday as I start at lunchtime. Another sleep in whooo whooo…it’s good to be alive now

Monday, April 16, 2007

Say... Say...

Government Yard...Good friends we had… in this great future you can forget your past …

I have no clue what to write about. Should I mention the most recent of events or the most important or the most disturbing things that have happened??

I have been working as work is a permanent feature in my life. I am so tired of the work I do even if it is satisfying all the time. Does it even make sense to find something tiring and satisfying at the same time? I have no idea the direction my work should take. I have had two full years at the same place now. What should I do? Where shall I take it from here if I don't get into Uni to do Midwifery?? I am tired of people dying on me and before anyone says “that’s part of life” stop yourself and think when have you had to witness it on weekly basis and when did you last wash a dead person or looked at the patients family and said those God awful words that sound fake even when you really mean them “I am sorry for your loss”
I am just tired in my soul. I feel older than my 25 years. I need a relaxing job in an office (maybe managing a GP surgery, eh?).

Since I have been back home I have immersed myself in work not only at the hospital but with scouts and at home. I am trying to make my flat into a home and its just not really working. It always looks like an iskabule place (that means a shababs house btw!). It needs that special touch that only married people or mums seem capable of. I have really tried and it looks nice enough but not to my satisfaction.
I am getting a new kitchen and bathroom in a few weeks time InshaAllah though. That might just be what my place needs.
This is what I have done in the last two months (for those of you that want to be updated on my boring, work centred life)

· Attend Mary’s show at Royal Exchange Theatre
· Make dinner for friends at my place
· Attend study days (2 in last month)
· Spend a lovely weekend in London with friends
· Go to 2 leaving dinners (Banker’s and Twin’s)
· Become GSL in our scouts group
· I have a new roommate (my 16 year old bro is moving in!)
· I did a career talk at Xavarian
· I did a Health and Social care talk at Bolton School
· We had a picnic at Hullard Park
· I attended a few Tuesday circles

OK so now I am bored with writing about my life. It is boring and sad at the moment. Will write again when I can articulate what is happening really in my part of the world.

I have access to Internet again so I will once again be polluting and taking up unnecessary space on the net… long may it continue.